I recently received a rejection letter from a festival that I wanted the band to play, and I was dismissed with one sentence. At first it felt like a kick to the gut. Not that it’s my first rejection by any means, but I am fortunate to have very positive feedback in my work, critical acclaim record deals, and well received international and domestic performances. Most importantly, I have loyal and dedicated fans and one can get used to the good stuff. But as the minutes rolled, I realized my mom would say, “let it roll, like water off a duck’s back!” Once again, easier said than done, but it prompted me to really think about what happens when we are rejected, and how to remedy the auto pain response instead of obsessing with mono vision on the one that got away
For some reason I immediately think of Europe, Ireland, Paris, Australia, Japan, and the world becomes so big again that I stop obsessing about the one, single sentence, and I realize that it’s a big world out there, filled with promise and people and “you can’t be all things to all people.” Then, my dear brother offers up the “Every Huge Rock Band in the world has been rejected, every single one!” He then describes the hideous rejection of the Beatles by Decca Records, which I will find and post here in the near future. In the end it is our ego that gets in the way, and The Four Agreements says, “Don’t take anything personally.” What someone thinks of you is none of your business and has nothing to do with you, and if you accept their comment, it’s as if you agree with them, like saying, “ How did you know?” I list these things to be used as tools, because let’s face it, rejection sucks, but a friend of mine used to say,“You don’t define me, I define me.”
So I say , put down the rejection like a bucket of dirty water and chalk it up to life experience. Older and Wiser, live to fight another day. Etc….